2003

22nd April Posted by: ASTRAL AMERICA : [News feed] PICTURE: Archive movie material about silverskulls. NARRATION: Biologists theorize whether or not mankind truly -is- at the top of the food chain after, earlier today, a pack of silverskulls attacked and killed a tourist that had wandered too far into the forests. Whilst silverskulls have long since been known to attack humans, this is the first case of death in over 20 years, causing much concern amongst civilians and officials. PICTURE: What is roughly identifyable as the remains of the aforementioned tourist, a pile of almost clean bones. NARRATION: The forests have now been classed as 'off limits' entirely, which may end up impacting on tourism more than the actual silverskull scare in itself has already caused. We shall keep you updated. Posted by: DARK ARCADIA : ["Channel Zero" news, national TV exclusive] PICTURE: (( A (forced-ly) smiling international represative of The Empire of Obsidian Jewel [TEXT: Kim Xang] shaking the hand of the charismatic leader of the new - and surprisingly strong - nation of Dark Arcadia. )) NARRATION: The nation of Obsidian Jewel was heartily accepted into the newly established Dark Arcadia union. The newly founded nation of Obsidian' was overly eager to join, which is seen by many Arcadia experts as a good sign of the future of the union, which our president is wishing to expand further. Posted by: ASTRAL AMERICA : [News feed] PICTURE: See above. NARRATION: After various -threats- by the newly founded nation of Dark Arcadia towards the equally new nation of Obsidian Jewel, latter, to avoid completely military destruction at the hands of an all too aggressive nation, has meekly signed a few contracts that are only SLIGHTLY less radical than eradication, and submitted. Some UN members are looking upon this with concern, but since the UN is constantly more involved with 'more important things', it has not been addressed, and likely never will be. Astral America reports protests have started in it's nation's capital, Altamont. All in all, the only nation looking at this with a smile seems to be Dark Arcadia itself.

23rd April Telegram from FOPERSTAN to DARK ARCADIA : We are prepared to immediately send to you a trial package of 100,000 units of ICV -Approved Textbooks on Natural Science, Philosophy, Policy and Justice. Your goverment may then conduct an experimental educational measure in your lands, to see if your people accept our doctrines. Should you later choose to agree to a few small print stipulations, we will continue to provide all educational materials for free in future! Telegram from DARK ARCADIA to FOPERSTAN : I thank you kindly for your generous offer. I would, however, like to repay you for this favour, as science, philosophy, et cetera, is very important to my nation as is, and thus more valuable than you might think. I wish not to double cross. How may Dark Arcadia repay you? Telegram from FOPERSTAN to DARK ARCADIA : Your support and understanding of the ICV and its goals is payment enough for us. We continue to monitor the international situation with growing unease.

24th April Posted by: DARK ARCADIA : [News feed] The Empire of Dark Arcadia and it's newly aquainted county of Obsidian Jewel have commenced involving themselves in interregional politics. Dark Arcadia received 100,000 educational textbooks from the Federation of Foperstan from the Imperial Continent Vector (ICV) today. The connection to Foperstan remains an obscure one, however, as the government of Dark Arcadia has chosen not to comment on the situation. Reliable sources note, however, that the textbooks were, in fact, a free offer from Foperstan. Astral America's president, Neike Satana, has worded her mistrust in the situation. It was duly noted, but no responses have been made. Posted by: DARK ARCADIA : [News feed] Shocking news has just reached us at SNN (Shadowmarch News Network) that ten government officials of the previous nation of Obsidian Jewel were -publically executed- today by request of the ruler of Dark Arcadia for failing to inform His Najesty about trade agreements between Obsidian and Praeraptoria. The Dark Arcadia public has been informed that these people committed near-atrocities, with a longer speech following by His Najesty personally, adressing the situation. Many of the remaining once rulers of the country have now fled to the neighbouring country of Astral America. All in all, 562 people have fled due to the situation at hand, a surprisingly -small- amount, and Astral America is dealing with this with ease. Posted by: OBSIDIAN JEWEL : [Channel Jewelbyte Trade News: National TV Exclusive] PICTURE: A small fleet of armoured trade ships laden with five tonnes of oil, leaving Troy bound for Altamont, due to arrive later today. NARRATION: This said to be a tactful gift from the county Obsidian Jewel to the President himself. PICTURE: A small convoy of trucks carrying stone and iron leaving Pompei bound for Altamont, due to arrive tomorrow NARRATION: It's not being said how much is being delivered but sources guess anything btweem one and 100 tonnes of resources are or soon will be on thier way to Altamont. PICTURE: A squadron of trade jets carying diamonds, coal and sulfur leaving Rune, bound for Altamont and due to arrive in Altamont within the hour. NARRATION: It is also thought be an apology from the the International Rep herself, though this is uncertain as she was taken down with flu-like sypmtoms early yesterday morning and has not been seen since by any outsiders.

25th April Posted by: EROTIC PANTHEISM : Press release from the Office of the Proconsul of the Holy Republic of Erotic Pantheism: My ambassador to the UN has just endorsed a resolution to ban single hull oil tankers. The citizens of the HREP feel strongly that preserving the environment, for the sensual enjoyment of our posterity, is an important issue. We heartily recommend that our neighbors join us in endorsing this resolution. Posted by: EROTIC PANTHEISM : Proposal for a UN Resolution: "End Victimless Crimes" It is the position of the Holy Republic of Erotic Pantheism that government exists for the benefit of the governed, and that citizens have the right to determine their own destinies, insofar as they do not harm others. Bearing this principle in mind, laws that persecute people on the basis of choices that affect only themselves (and/or other consenting adults) are clearly unacceptable. We therefore propose a world-wide ban on laws against "crimes" in which there are no identifiable "victims". Note that we understand that governments may wish to regulate certain activities: smoking in public places may pose health risks to others; prostitution and drug use may be licensed, to ensure that those involved to not cause risks to public health or the economy; it may be determined that people are unable to "consent" under certain conditions (underage, impairment from drugs or mental defect, etc); etc. We merely propose an end to laws banning behavior based solely on irrational, inexplicable disapproval of that behavior. We consider this an important step in the continuing progress of our species away from medieval narrow-mindedness, towards an enlightened future. We currently favor submission of this proposal by our UN Delegate, the Queendom of Sahistan. However, should our neighbors favor us with the requisite two UN Endorsements, we will happily submit it ourselves. Posted by: OBSIDIAN JEWEL : [Channel Starbyte: News Feed] PICTURE: A small fleet of trade ships laden with silver and mercury, leaving Troy bound for Altamont, due to arrive later tonight. NARRATION: This said to be the second such 'gift ' from the county Obsidian Jewel to the President himself. PICTURE: A small convoy of trucks carrying gold leaving Pompei bound for Altamont, due to arrive tomorrow. NARRATION: It's not being said exactly how much is being delivered and our sources do not have any idea of how much has left Obsidian Jewel within the last three days. PICTURE: A squadron of trade jets carrying crystal leaving Rune, bound for Altamont and due to arrive there within the hour. NARRATION: The International Rep. (Kim Xang) has now fully recovered from her mystery illness which turned out not to be the flu afterall and scientists are wondering what struck her down so swiftly. Obsidian Jewel waits with baited breath, in the hopes that it is not a new virus. PICTURE: Docters, taking a blood sample from the International Rep. and running tests on it. Posted by: EROTIC PANTHEISM : Page One newsbox in Carpe Diem, the HREP's leading news journal. The Proconsul of the HREP today announced that he has received one of the requisite two UN Endorsements required for submitting UN proposals. The proconsul remarked, "I am very pleased to have the friendship of the Free Land of Earwicker. As we have seen just today, in a report from the UN, their nation has the finest environment in all Shadowmarch, a great achievment indeed." The administration is awaiting news on a second endorsement, and plans to submit a proposal to ban laws against victimless crimes as soon as such an endorsement is made. Posted by: EROTIC PANTHEISM : OpEd from the Carpe Diem: Politically aware citizens are wondering why their UN Delegate has not yet taken a position on the proposal currently before that august body. The proposal, which aims to protect our coastal waters, and the oceans of the world at large, by banning single-hulled oil tankers, is supported by an overwhelming majority of citizens in the HREP, and the office of the Proconsul has issued a statement endorsing it. The Queendom of Sahistan, the Shadowmarch Regional Delegate to the UN, though widely renowned for its own beautiful environment, has not yet taken a stand on this issue. The editorial board of the Carpe Diem hopes to hear soon from Queen Sahi on this issue. If she plans not to vote for the proposal, we would like to know why. Does she consider this to be a situation in which personal / business freedoms trump environmental concerns? Has she simply lost interest in the UN? Inquiring minds want to know! Posted by: PRAERAPTORIA : [Channel StarCrusher: News Bulletin] PICTURE: The Chieftess of Praeraptoria shaking hands with the ruler of the smaller nation of Dark Arcadia. NARRATION: The Praeraptorian leader, Ky Satana hands over control of Praeraptoria to Dark Arcadia due to the want to support Dark Arcadia in getting Astral America back.

26th April Telegram from DARK ARCADIA to PRAERAPTORIA : Many thanks for your token of alliance. However, I must warn you that His Najesty has a very low tolerance level for such things as religion and other non-science based things. Also, His Najesty requires you to keep him updated as to everything you will do beyond this point concerning national or international politics, unless these politics concern Umbrae. We are aware that integrating former nations into Dark Arcadia is a slow procedure and sometimes is accompanied by troubles or conflicts we wish not to provoke. Thus it is crucial for us to know what you plan. If your educational sector needs support, we are willing to give you this in the form of financial aid at this point in time, but request you take better care of your economy in future times. We will keep you updated. Telegram from DARK ARCADIA to FOPERSTAN : Your gift has been received by the public and has been well accepted. Again, we wish to word our thanks. Does the ICV, in turn, have any publically accessible information on bio' technology? If not, we would be more than happy to return the favour by sending you such data. I am afraid we cannot offer you 100,000 text books, but instead, would give this information to you digitally, to be printed and reprinted as you like it. Would the ICV - and you as a nation - have interest in this return offer? Posted by: DARK ARCADIA : [News feed] Today's UN report caused an uproar in Dark Arcadia, as apparent statistical evidence was brought forth declaring it dumber than Astral America. Government spokeperson Dr. Kaplan said: [Voice of Kaplan mixed with the static of the telephone] "Unless they either had a very bad pick or are using a seriously outdated IQ test - or an IQ test at all - I cannot explain this. Naturally, we were in need of compensations in regions other than education after splitting off Astral America, but keep in mind that Umbrae is still over 50% made out of scientists, of which 25% have a high degree. This error further demonstrates the lack of the UN's insight. For their own sake, as that they be not humiliated further, I hope their next report to be more accurate." It is to be noted that the entirety of Shadowmarch seems to have an above average intelligence seeded in their population, however, so that in today's world report, Dark Arcadia's 'Umbrae' is somewhere close to 45 000 out of the 100 000 availible, and it's county 'Praeraptoria' at roughly 95 000.

27th April Telegram from FOPERSTAN to DARK ARCADIA : We would be delighted to accept your information on bio-tech. Indeed, we have had to focus on other areas, such as refining uranium for our partners, education, and information technology adaptations, that we've practically no knowledge in biotech... in particular biological weaponary, which interests us deeply for purely scientific reasons. Telegram from DARK ARCADIA to FOPERSTAN : We will send you all our publically accessibly bio'-technological data, along with an amount of data on our own military advances, though His Najesty has yet to decide how much of this to divulge - however, he has worded that there -will- be data sent, and left no doubt about it. Please excuse any delays in this matter. The publically accessible data has been sent to you in the form of 14 DVD-ROMs via airmail. If you should experience troubles accessing that data specifically once it arrives, please get back to us. Some of the formats are a little more obscure, and although DVD-ROM #14 includes almost all programs you will need to view the data, we are not sure if we have not overlooked something. We would be happy to send you any further tools, either hardware or software wise, to help you access, copy and distribute the data. Please get back to us when and whether the DVD-ROMs have arrived. Telegram from FOPERSTAN to DARK ARCADIA : Thank you! We have recieved your DVD-ROM packages. The originals have been placed in out National Library into the permanent collection, and copies have been made and sent to the best schools, universities in the country as well as to the Militant Youth Clique Corps. We deeply appreciate your help.

28th April Posted by: DARK ARCADIA : [Referring to recent ICV troubles.] His Najesty, leader of the Empire of Dark Arcadia, has declared he wishes to offer the ICV full military backup in case of any war breaking out, (especially His trading partner Foperstan). "To whom it may concern: The Empire of Dark Arcadia has it's own goals in the region of Shadowmarch and it's own conflicts. Due to the fruitful commerce between Foperstan and our nation, however, we will expand on our goals according to what benifits us most, which is the protection of Foperstan and it's alliances. It is also to be noted that whilst Dark Arcadia has never been religiously discriminating, we reserve no right to judge over the ICV, which, as an entity, has proven to have excellent logical judgements. Should military backups be needed, we will provide for it. We will offer all our defensive mechanisms, but no offensive ones." Posted by: EROTIC PANTHEISM : Press Release from the Office of the Proconsul of the Holy Republic of Erotic Pantheism... With the support of the Queendom of Sahistan, our proposal to end laws against victimless crimes, throughout the civilized world, has been submitted to the UN. All nations with borders or trade agreements with other regions of the world are encouraged to use their contacts to encourage endorsement of this momentous proposal by other regional delegates. Additionally, it has come to the attention of the administration that Queen Sahi's representative at the UN has, at the last minute, registered a vote in favor of the current proposal before the UN general assembly, to ban single-hulled tankers. The Proconsul commented that he is "delighted" with these developments, and wishes to thank Queen Sahi and the people of Sahistan for their continuing support of social progress.